Dear you,
You solicit my thoughts with your verbal walk. Your explicit talk spits at my heart and eats through it like acid leaving remnants of my emotions placid. Ink blots on my sheets take on the form of tears that leak from a broken spirit that weeps and seeks revenge within a pen that lets ink seep on to the pages of your face. Your black eyes glare at me and I stare emitting my rage on to your lines so I can violate your life.
You claim you dont play games but your the reigning champion. You run races throughout my mind taking pit stops in my heart. I numbly wave the checkered flag as you drag out your final lap and I wonder how much longer will this last... Why wont you just pack up and depart.. erase the mark that you have carved in my soul.
Bestowed upon my soul is a curse that constantly lets me know that you have let go and the pain continues to grow critically as i close my eys and see you bitterly
Im normally not the type who points fingers, but when your poisoned kiss still lingers it makes it hard for me to think clearly.. My mind is telling me to go sometimes when my heart says "NO"... And and then my heart switches up and says " put it all on the frontline" while my mind says "fall behind"
Every now and then I slip through the cracks I checked into rehab so I could no longer intoxicate myself with you but relapsed "Indulging in Drunken Highs and Sleepless Nights" making my way to the bottom of liquor bottles in search of you every night. I inwardly fight daily for a way out but I cant seem to recover from your last clout that left me scribbling for life in the ICU because I foolishly decided to intensively care for you
My spirit's taking me through lyrical therapy... making records mentally I gradually get you out of my system manually, Writing vengefully with out wishful thinking but with enraged truths. The facts about the me's and the you's, The fact that me and you are now spitefully connected forcing me to see your truth's full of shit and it makes me long... long to kiss and blow kisses with my fist... to make your heart beat with a lisp because you put mine on crutches and now i love with a limp from a permanent emotional dent...
Your name was the song of my heart topping the charts but now your tune seldomly plays becoming a one hit wonder. Memories of your voice cracks with static through the speakers of my soul... So... I closed my eyes and changed the station to 99. Peace of Mind because I'd rather cut the line than you string me along like wasted lines in a forgotten love song
And I will go one with my life as if you never existed and forget about love becuase I'll never miss it. I'm putting my feelings aside for the sake of my pride.. no more getting inside through a glimpse of my eyes... Emotions on a shelf.... Everything else.... Im keeping to myself.
Monday, April 19, 2010
Friday, April 16, 2010
A LETTER TO MY FORMER LOVE (4.15.10)
Dear you,
I can no longer address you as love because I no longer know you as such. To clear any obscurities, I am not writing this for you, but merely to you as a way to forget you and rid you of my thoughts. You have invaded my thoughts, and yes.... yes I do feel violated this time. Why? Because you are indeed trespassing and you ARE NOT welcomed here any longer. You have breached my frontal lobe making your way to my hippocampus... leaking... seeping into my already poisoned blood stream making it 11 times as deadly. My blood has become the venom that's spoken from the serpants tongue and has lead to the destruction of mankind.
Why?... Why must I ask you this question? It is because I must ask you why.... Why so? Because like many others I too wonder how a once beloved soul can instantly turn cold falling below the freezing point and exceeding the mark of death. You have turned so cold to the point that it burns... Burns deep into my soul, engulfing me in flames.. making me the flame that can now point you towards the direction of hell. Accented with the touch of Hades, you have been marked with three sixes attaching you to his soul... and for that I-- I-- I'm forced to let you go.. Go and wander into lands unknown, although I know where each land ends without a turning point, turning into the destruction of who I knew as the true and pure you.
I must say however, that i do not feel the slightest sympathy nor the faintest sign of compassion for you, but i do wish you the best of luck ... at falling on your face.. heart first. I bitterly speak as a means to to release your childish defeat of an honest me. I have you know that I am indeed writing with a vengeful pen, but by the end of this letter, perhaps I will have let you go and regain control of who I really am. I can no longer accept the truth spoken from future lips because you reveal yourself in each line with every word. I can no longer give, think, or love whole heartedly. I think of you faintly and suddenly the world stops spinning... freezing time as I happily yet relucntantly erase you from my life.
I must admit, I am insulted for having a juvenile mindset. I dared to think.... I had the audacity to hope... to hope that things would not happen eventhough i knew they would. Although, I was never too blind to see what has come of you because it was visible all along.... I do however, suppose I was too naive to believe that you were never who you put on display for me. I now see however, that the truth is indeed an ugly thing to see... especially when its spoken through the lips of such a beautiful liar.... and with that said...Goodbye.
P.S. By the way Miss.... Your poor lack of judgement is showing... Just thought you should know.
I can no longer address you as love because I no longer know you as such. To clear any obscurities, I am not writing this for you, but merely to you as a way to forget you and rid you of my thoughts. You have invaded my thoughts, and yes.... yes I do feel violated this time. Why? Because you are indeed trespassing and you ARE NOT welcomed here any longer. You have breached my frontal lobe making your way to my hippocampus... leaking... seeping into my already poisoned blood stream making it 11 times as deadly. My blood has become the venom that's spoken from the serpants tongue and has lead to the destruction of mankind.
Why?... Why must I ask you this question? It is because I must ask you why.... Why so? Because like many others I too wonder how a once beloved soul can instantly turn cold falling below the freezing point and exceeding the mark of death. You have turned so cold to the point that it burns... Burns deep into my soul, engulfing me in flames.. making me the flame that can now point you towards the direction of hell. Accented with the touch of Hades, you have been marked with three sixes attaching you to his soul... and for that I-- I-- I'm forced to let you go.. Go and wander into lands unknown, although I know where each land ends without a turning point, turning into the destruction of who I knew as the true and pure you.
I must say however, that i do not feel the slightest sympathy nor the faintest sign of compassion for you, but i do wish you the best of luck ... at falling on your face.. heart first. I bitterly speak as a means to to release your childish defeat of an honest me. I have you know that I am indeed writing with a vengeful pen, but by the end of this letter, perhaps I will have let you go and regain control of who I really am. I can no longer accept the truth spoken from future lips because you reveal yourself in each line with every word. I can no longer give, think, or love whole heartedly. I think of you faintly and suddenly the world stops spinning... freezing time as I happily yet relucntantly erase you from my life.
I must admit, I am insulted for having a juvenile mindset. I dared to think.... I had the audacity to hope... to hope that things would not happen eventhough i knew they would. Although, I was never too blind to see what has come of you because it was visible all along.... I do however, suppose I was too naive to believe that you were never who you put on display for me. I now see however, that the truth is indeed an ugly thing to see... especially when its spoken through the lips of such a beautiful liar.... and with that said...Goodbye.
P.S. By the way Miss.... Your poor lack of judgement is showing... Just thought you should know.
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